Today we’d like to introduce you to Jeremy Mohler.
Hi Jeremy, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?
Many years ago, a painful breakup led me to seek out therapy. I learned how to soothe my anxiety, be more authentic with others, and give myself compassion. I grew and learned so much from therapy that I eventually decided to become a therapist myself.
I bring all of my personal and professional experience—touring the country as a musician, marketing for Fortune 500 tech companies, advocating for economic and racial justice in Congress, and teaching mindfulness meditation—into helping men and couples figure out what’s in the way of having the relationship and living the life they want.
From my days working in the labor movement, I bring a particular lens to being a therapist. I consider myself a feminist, though one who believes in a “feminism for the 99 percent,” which in the words of Fraser, Cinzia Arruzza, and Tithi Bhattacharya “does not limit itself to ‘women’s issues’ as they are traditionally defined. Standing for all who are exploited, dominated, and oppressed, it aims to become a source of hope for the whole of humanity.” I believe a different, fairer, safer, healthier society is possible—but only through, as Martin Luther King Jr. put it, a “radical redistribution of political and economic power.”
Being a therapist for the past few years has shown me that many men (including myself) reject the outdated, unhealthy version of masculinity being sold to us by powerful politicians, billionaires, and “manfluencers.” Yet, we’re struggling to find a way of being a man that aligns with our values.
On the one hand, we’re told we’re too privileged, not emotionally available enough, and potentially dangerous. On the other, we’re told it’s “natural” for us to be dominant, emotionally reserved, and aggressive.
So, I also write a newsletter called Make Men Emotional Again for men learning how to navigate your emotions and craving deeper, healthier, more meaningful relationships and friendships
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
The biggest struggle has been getting men to care. Plenty of women subscribe to my newsletter and tell me that I’m doing such important work as a therapist working with men. But most men go silent or just say, “That’s cool,” when I tell them I help men with relationship and mental health issues. Many of my newsletter subscribers are women, and they often comment on posts and send me emails. Only a few men do. Other than the deep, meaningful work I’m doing with a handful of therapy clients through my work, I struggle with finding more connection with men. And the few friends who are men who do make an effort to invest in our friendship say the same thing. Men (like many people these days) are craving a bigger, deeper sense of community, but we haven’t been taught the emotional, communication, and relational skills to make that happen. That’s why I’m so fired up about my work!
Thanks – so what else should our readers know about Jeremy Mohler Therapy?
There aren’t many therapists who are men, and fewer who specialize in working with men. While everyone deals with mental health issues, and some marginalized folks are forced to deal with them more than others, men suffer in particular ways. That’s where I come in. After working with men for a few years, I’ve noticed patterns. Men tend to hide our emotions and try to tough it out. We tend to shy away from vulnerable or emotional conversations. We tend to overvalue career success and undervalue relationships, friendships, and community. And these tendencies are making many of us isolated, lonely, and feeling lost. That’s where I come in. I’ve been through painful breakups. I’ve been to therapy and learned how embracing and communicating my emotions makes my life so much better. I’ve found a way forward for men in the 21st century, and I want more men to know about it.
Before we let you go, we’ve got to ask if you have any advice for those who are just starting out?
Go to therapy yourself. If you’re hoping to work in a healing profession, you don’t have to be fully healed (no one is). But you need to be somewhere on your journey. That’s how I learned the skills I use every day with my clients. I learned through experience. I didn’t learn from a book in grad school. None of that matters when I’m sitting with a client who’s crying because he just remembered a time that his dad hit him as a kid or a time his mother shamed him for being “soft” or other kids laughed at him in his first-grade class. What matters is whether I can hold my client’s emotions with him. What matters is my capacity for tension and emotion. And that comes from doing the work myself.
Pricing:
- Individual therapy – $190/session
- Men’s group therapy – $100/session
- Couples therapy – $205/session
Contact Info:
- Website: https://jeremymohler.blog
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mens.relationship.therapist/
- Other: https://makemenemotionalagain.com
